I love a casino, probably a bit too much, and I like them more when I end up walking out with a shirt still on my back. Fortunately though for my bank balance we weren't here just to hit the tables.
I’d been invited down to try out the new steak menu at Heliot’s, the casinos in house restaurant, then to catch a show in the Matcham suite. It’s fair to say they were expecting me but I couldn't help getting swept up in the high roller treatment.
Maybe it was all the extra oxygen that gets pumped in but I felt giddy; I was Ace Rothstien...
Nicky's methods of betting weren't scientific, but they worked. When he won, he collected. When he lost, he told the bookies to go fuck themselves. I mean, what were they going to do, muscle Nicky? Nicky was the muscle.
"These are for Paul... Take them straight to Paul’s table!"
In the casino, the cardinal rule is to keep them playing and to keep them coming back. The longer they play, the more they lose, and in the end, we get it all.
Our cocktails appeared in moments, the wine, an excellent Cab Shiraz by Some Young Punks, swiftly afterwards so it could breathe. This was destined to be a fun evening!
No matter how big a guy might be, Nicky would take him on. You beat Nicky with fists, he comes back with a bat. You beat him with a knife, he comes back with a gun. And if you beat him with a gun, you better kill him, because he'll keep comin' back and back until one of you is dead.
Food wise you can expect a solid meal; I went for the milk fed veal chop, cooked nicely medium rare, and ordered the bone marrow gravy along side. The gravy was pretty special and the chop lived up to my expectations. The surf and turf looked pretty good; perfectly cooked scallops and prawns alongside a healthy slab of fillet with a cute little brass pan of glistening garlic butter.
Listen to me very carefully. There are three ways of doing things around here: the right way, the wrong way, and the way that *I* do it. You understand?
The food though was just the beginning of the evening and we were here to see the Soho Burlesque Club as well. Until this point I’d never seen Burlesque before so I just didn’t know what to expect.
The evening was hosted by Polly Rae and the show was simply excellent. Stylish, funny, acrobatic, and damn sexy I was captivated.
It was a mix of dance, stand-up, cabaret, and circus acts and after several cocktails and working my way through the red I loved every minute. The girls were glamorous, the guys were hot (mental note - must start going back to the gym) and insanely athletic, I couldn’t help but kick myself for not going sooner!
The evening was great fun all in all; good food, great service, excellent entertainment, excellent smoking area on the roof, and I doubled my money on the roulette table. I know what you'll be thinking and yes it's casino, yes it's showy, yes they might have hired an interior designer with ADHD issues but it was a lot of fun. In short, you mo-mo, GO!